(on the TTC front)

We’re still working on it.  We’ve had some setbacks though.  My husband’s semen analysis results aren’t good. let me take a little detour on my way to telling you all about my getting the results from the test.

On Friday afternoon on my way home from work I found out that my sister in law is pregnant again.  We started TTC shortly after she got pregnant with their first.  Lilly is now 7 months old and sister in law is 8 ½ weeks pregnant.  So yeah that hurt.  More than I could have ever imagined it would.  Not only because they’re having their second child before we even have one, but because sister and brother in law don’t have a very good relationship.  I’m very well aware that that is none of my business and doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have babies…it’s just  hard to hear she’s pregnant again. 

When I got home I dreaded having to tell my husband the news.  I went to chat with him and he was in a terrible mood. Like as bad as it gets, didn’t want to talk to me, was cussing and saying he didn’t even care if we had kids, and then proceeded to climb into bed at 5:45 on a Friday night and claim to be going to sleep…..all because he had received a voice mail from the RE’s office with his semen analysis results.  What are they you’re wondering? Well he couldn’t tell me because he deleted the message.  He got so angry listening to the bad results he just deleted the message from his phone.  I ended up lying in bed with him for 45 minutes talking, listening, not saying anything, and crying.

So I have no idea what the results are.  Still don’t.  The person I need to talk to is out of the office so I can’t get any answers until tomorrow.  Its driving me crazy. google is driving me crazy. I have been googling “bad semen analysis results” and “ lifespan of semen” and such all afternoon --- well not all afternoon because I do have to work.

The key is my husband has to completely stop drinking.  He has to have a completely healthy diet and then hopefully that will help.  But it’s the holidays, he isn’t going to stop drinking….I mean I wouldn’t want to. Anytime we go to a holiday party I see a beer in his hand and I get dramatic and think, there goes another chance at us having a baby.  I know 1 beer isn’t going to do it, but I also think at this point we need any help we can get.

I’m worried I’ll talk to the dr. tomorrow only to find out we can’t do the IUI in January because his semen isn’t good enough.  He has been taking these special vitamins from the dr., so maybe that’s helped?  I wouldn’t be surprised if he needs to do another semen analysis before we can move forward with the IUI.

p.s. it’s only been a month since I did all that test at the RE’s office and I feel like it’s been months!