Just rambling on

I never wanted my blog to exclusively follow my infertility.  When I started writing it was admittedly about wanting to have a baby and document pregnancy, but as I didn’t get pregnant it became more.  It became a place to talk about my life, home, cooking, dogs...and somehow this past summer when IVF failed I feel like it turned really gray, which truly represented my mood.

I recognize that the past couple weeks have been a lot about my getting pregnant, but I don’t want anyone to think for a second that I’ve forgotten about the journey I’ve been on for the past 22 months. It was hard. It broke my heart, it killed a piece of me.

But I’m alive and happy, and I know I would be even if I wasn’t pregnant. I was dealing with the failed IVF cycle, and what that meant for my family.

So all my friends still struggling with IF, I think about you daily. I think about the struggle daily.  I thank whatever is out there that I experienced what I went through because it made me am who I am today.  I hated every second of it, but it is one of life’s hard curveballs that I had to deal with I guess. I’M STILL ANGRY. I still find myself getting upset when I hear other people are pregnant or got pregnant quickly. Why did I have this struggle?  And so don’t think I’m not thinking about you.

I clearly still have things I need to discuss with my counselor.

Now that I’m pregnant this blog isn’t only going to be about my pregnancy.  Just like infertility did, it will obviously include that aspect of my life, but I do plan on picking back up on writing about cooking, decorating, dogs…